Growing up and Autism-and the benefits of Home education

Google has just been with us on a family holiday.He went aged fourteen and came back fifteen.

As always, holidays give us  the time to reflect on how he has matured.Long gone are the physical outbursts of anger, the kicking of doors and throwing of chairs.What we have now is a very tall, handsome teenager whose voice has dropped to  deep base and who has a  sense of  identity and a conviction about  his own strong views and opinions.

He couldn't give a fig if  people think his views or actions are 'strange'.He is just who he is and he's happy with that.

School doesn't prepare you for life.I read this week about a study that confirmed it. Dr. Gerard Hoefling, of the autism support program, Drexel University, Philadelphia:has said,

"We make the erroneous assumption that high schools are getting students ready for college, and they're not really.

That's not their primary task. High schools do a wonderful job
of getting students ready to graduate from high school."

I firmly believe that. How many children know how bank rates work, how to use a credit card, about the electoral system and democracy and communism and dictatorships for example?

As I watched my son I realised that he wasn't wearing his ear defenders, he checked out a menu on-line before going to a restaurant so he could choose his meal in advance without being overwhelmed by the choice. He paid for a DVD over the counter without support. Suggested to his sister that they go to the local park on holiday,then went out the door and set off to the park with her struggling to get her shoes on and follow him.Despite having no wifi on holiday he happily joined in family discussions and played board games ( with only the slightest mutter about the benefits of digital technology) He went to bed at a fairly reasonable time for him (and slept!) and he even managed a trip to the Metro centre in Newcastle where we had a Chinese buffet and then a short shop for his sister to buy a birthday present.Whilst he indicated that he did find that uncomfortable, he patiently sat it out without a meltdown and I realised that he had grown up substantially.

He is able to communicate his needs far better now.When he had blisters from walking, he told me that so I could offer thicker socks to cushion them.He told me he gets a bad back from sitting at the computer so long (something which I suspected but he has never told me) so we have discussed the benefits of more fresh air and exercise and a better computer desk and chair.

Now that he is 15 I have suggested that our aim for the year is to enable him to support himself more by making meals ( and ensuring he doesn't forget to eat) and also we need to start looking at ways he can start to learn to bring in an income (possibly a computer based income which would make complete sense for someone with autism)

Who knows where we will be this time next year? We will just have to see!

Learn what you want to learn, when you want to learn it.

Today I recommended this book to a couple of parents after I read this article. It is one of the books which has most influenced the way I educate my children.Having home educated Google since he was eight I felt guilty at failing to home educate the other two ( there was a spell when I home educated my eldest with Google for a year) but Google's needs were too great at that time and that year gave my eldest the space and time he needed to  grow and make his own choices about his education.

What this book taught me was that by sending my children to school I wasn't handing over their education to the government with it's narrow curriculum and  inflexibility towards the individual needs of each and every pupil but I  was choosing to primarily offer them the education opportunities they wanted to do such as dance,play the drums,sing,go camping and kayaking and walking, at home. Similarly life skills, morals and responsability and  consideration for others were the domain of our family  whilst school was a place where my social children could choose to socialise and spend time with their friends. 

There have been occasions when teachers have questioned my daughter's choice not to participate in after school activities- they seem to think that if you don't take part at school you're not doing anything at all.

I've had to explain she's  far too busy choosing what she wants to do outside of school with different teachers, teachers who want to share their passions with no other motive than to see others share their enjoyment where their enthusiasm shines through.Where   there are no tests  to pass unless you choose to take them.

It's a concept that some of them find hard to understand.Apparently most kids don't want to 'learn' when they're not at school.I wonder why? Perhaps they're being put off by what they are being taught at school? 

Singing Softly,Wonderfully well

Last night The Ghyll singers were invited to sing at a concert in St Martins church in Bowness on Windermere.

Living in such a beautiful area of the world we get to sing in some lovely spots. As we drove along the shores of Windermere the trees were just coming into bud and the blossom trees and rhododendrons were in flower,not forgetting of course the many thousands of daffodils made so famous by Wordsworth.

As guest singers to a wind band from Kendal we were able to sit back and enjoy most of the concert .We sang the pieces which had won us the South Lakes music competition and were congratulated in particular on our ability to sing quietly.

 I realised that slowly over the four years we had had our current conductor we had learned how to control our singing by pulling in our tummies,could sing the higher notes by  using our faces and smiling and had generally become more disciplined as a choir by listening to the other parts as we sang our own.That's the wonderful thing about learning, you just never stop.

Google for example has been reading up about politics.For the first time this year his older brother is eligible to vote and there have been discussions in our family about whether we actually agree with the current system. The conservatives and liberal democrats are currently joined by a coalition but never have I known the general public to be so disillusioned and mistrustful of MP's. A friend introduced me to an app designed to help new voters decide who to vote for. Bite the Ballot posed a series of questions and then suggested the parties as close as possible to the views of the voter.Vote for Policies was another site.It just shows how technology is changing the way we do things!

And as for progress with the C2B, only twenty days to go now and we went up Beacon Fell the other day. A super clear day and hardly a soul in sight, a fantastic place to live.

Little Bo Peep and Education about Sheep!

As I walked down the track with the dogs yesterday I rounded the corner and noticed three sheep ahead.Having lived in the country for about ten years now I've become proud of my shepherding skills and my ability to identify which sheep belongs to which farmer.In this case it was the shaggy curly haired sheep that gave them away.It was Blossom, a rare breed sheep that lives with one of my neighbours and which could only really be described as a pet.

On further inspection I discovered that there were in fact , five sheep, closely followed by my neighbour, her husband, daughter and pet labradoodle. They were , explained my neighbour matter of factly, going for a walk as she had run out of hay and was taking the sheep along the track so they could graze on the grass verges.

As the dogs and I looked on, the motley crew ambled past, taking no more than a cursory glance at the dogs as they strained on their leads to get a better look. You see some very strange sights in the country!

It's been a funny sheep week generally.These sheep  followed my friend and I through a field last week and one even came for a pat! I think they must have thought we must have looked like  dinner ladies!

Then yesterday there was a knock on the door. Our neighbouring farmer sent a message to say that one of his ewes was lambing if

 we wanted to run down to the farm.We were lucky. It was late on a sunny afternoon rather than a cold wet night in the lambing shed!

The ewe (a mule) which is a cross between a texel and a fell sheep for hardiness (they require strong teeth to graze the sea washed turf on the estuary) was lying in the field.Her waters had broken and Paul told us that it was often quite quick although one sheep had take forty minutes the previous day. The field was full of sheep having triplets. The mule would strain and lift her head upwards, then would get up and wander around eating grass.

This went on for quite some time and after about half an hour she seemed to be starting to tire. After 45 minutes, we novices were quite concerned, she didn't look well at all but then neither would we if we were giving birth to three babies. Paul came out and said it was taking longer than it should and decided to intervene.He invited us to watch as he put his hand into the Ewe's uterus and pulled out one very yellow lamb.The second to come out was lodged in a difficult position and wasn't breathing so Paul shook it and cleaned the mucus from its nose with straw.It was very small and weak and didn't look fit and healthy like its brother.Paul said only time would tell.He would leave it in the field for half an hour then bring it into the barn under a heat light over night.The final lamb popped out fit and healthy and, within minutes ,mum was licking both healthy lambs and they were up on their feet feeding from her colostrum. 

The weaker lamb was still on its side and hadn't tried to stand.Sadly we learned the next day that it hadn't made it.Perhaps nature knew it would have struggled to survive. Nature can be cruel sometimes.

Kebabs are the new K.F.C!

Google went to the kebab shop with his dad tonight. It's nice to see him going out voluntarily because he doesn't often choose to leave the house.
It's hard as a parent wanting him to go out and get fresh air and have a more balanced life but in fact by listening to him and not forcing him to go out then he has grown into a much happier and calmer child. To an autistic child trips out are less about socialising and more about getting something they want such as playing with a friend because the friend owns a digger, buying a game you want to play or going to the cinema.Each autistic child will have their own motivation.
The other day I  asked him if he thought he missed out by not going to school.He said that no doubt he did, but when I said he could go to school at any time he said that he didn't want to as teachers didn't understand autism and often made school a terrible place to be.
I've no doubt he is right.I'm increasingly being asked for advice about home education and have seen several local families embark on that journey in the last couple of years.A recent study shows an increase in the number  of families of autistic children's taking their local authority to tribunal and they are winning!
Locally families are beginning to get the placement their children need and the difference in their childrens' mental health and behaviour is obvious.
Parents in the west of the county are campaigning to set up an Autism academy .It is hard to see how they won't be successful. It is very much needed and these parents are passionate about getting the right help for their child!
I find myself on the fringe looking in.I desperately want them to succeed.If my son had been five years younger I would have wanted the same for him. Unfortunately for us our local authority neglected to mention the school which would have been totally appropriate for our son.They didn't want to fund it so presumably felt if they didn't mention it they wouldn't have to pay! Their strategies are starting to backfire, parents have raised thousands of pounds to fight them and have won.Their children are now being supported and helped.I just wish for their sakes that it could have been a lot sooner.http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/education-31111461
As for us, what turned out to be our only choice has in fact proved to be the best thing we ever did.It has changed the life of not only my son but our whole family. We have control over what we learn and we are not controlled by tests and grades and propoganda about not getting a good job without high grades.
Home education is teaching our children flexibility. They are able to adapt and learn when they need to and they are confident and happy.Even my daughter who is at school doesn't take it too seriously and has lots of out of school activities to balance her academic subjects
Even Google is learning slowly and surely to try new things. What used to be a weekly trip to KFC seems to have turned into a trip to the kebab shop!

Thinking for ourselves- when Education takes over!

In the light of The Corporation and Bowling for Columbine, Google and I have been looking at the economy and how it works. What the subject would be called at school is debatable. Certainly economics, possibly psychology. What I do know is that he wouldn't be studying it at school as part of the current National curriculum in the United Kingdom

 We have considered the power of large companies over the public and politicians, seen "Black Friday" and "Cyber Monday" (both American imports)  come and go, and the efforts of small business ' in Britain to fight back with "small business Saturday."

In "Bowling for Columbine" we saw that despite easy access to guns in the USA and Canada,gun crime in the USA is much higher. In the Canadian large cities gun crime was virtually non existent. The conclusion of the documentary was that the news media in America fed fear into  people, promoting negative and tragic stories because that's what brought in the money.
Whether the conclusion was right or wrong it made us think about society and the world we want to live in.


Google commented that he would like to live in Canada and we were certainly left with the impression that it was a country where community has not been lost, where people trust one another, where health care is free and wealth is distributed more fairly.

We also spoke to someone in the village who regularly watches News from France or Russia and Japan to get a more open view of what is happening in the world. Someone called her 'sad'. I call that open minded.

With petitions in circulation daily against injustices highlighted by members of the British public Google and I  have explored the working conditions of several large and 'successful' companies and are having to rethink  how and where we shop.

We've also looked at how food is marketed, what goes into processed food,how the obesity is rising and it is causing us to challenge what we do as a  family. In fact home education is changing our lives.

I've mentioned before that home education has made us more politically aware. Certainly Google follows current affairs with interest and has an opinion on most matters. He certainly doesn't sit back and accept the status quo!

I think that's what's wrong with our current education system.It doesn't challenge teenagers to think for themselves it's simply an exam processing machine!

 This morning I read a free E book about helping our children to develop into well rounded thinking individuals .It's called Re framing Success and it challenges the notion that those with high grades are 'successful"

I'm glad we took Google out of school.It's challenged us to look at what we do and change things when they don't sit comfortably with our beliefs.

So this year most of our Christmas presents are home made of from local businesses.We are trying to buy more fruit and less processed food,I've unsubscribed to some of the companies who send me daily promotional emails and trying to reuse and recycle where we can.

We have a long way to go but no matter how long it takes,each step is a step forward. Education is becoming part of our lives!

A Day out!

We' re very lucky to have a Wild life Park within 10 minutes of our house, which each year during the quiet season opens up its gates for free, or a minimal donation.

Every year we have dropped in for an hour or so to observe the animals and learn about their habitat and eating habits and we've found that by concentrating on only one or two each time and then just 'enjoying' the others for the sake of it, we have gradually built up a little bit of knowledge each time.

Yesterday ,after an abortive attempt the previous day, my son who has Aspergers and who suffers severe anxiety when venturing out, decided today was the day.

The weather was glorious and that meant that despite it being a school day there were lots of visitors with young children or holiday makers so I wasn't sure if it would work.  I have learned to play it by ear.

What I am learning however is that if my son wants to do something then he can overcome all his sensory difficulties and this was one of those days.

The zoo is being expanded and the new additions were the Artic wolves and Snow leopards.The wolves looked majestic as they stood together against the sky line!

Highlight of the day was, I think the white handed Gibbons, which 'whooped' (that's the only way I could describe their cry) to one another as they swung on ropes and balanced on them as though they were sitting on planks a foot wide! We stood and watched the spectacle for a good ten minutes!

The colouring of some of the  birds feathers is dazzling and here are just two of the photos we took between us. The lovely thing about home education is that it is constantly cross curricular so as well as learning biology and geography we were doing art too!

The Gophers with their funny stance came up quite close to inspect us.

and the Capybara (this one reminded me of Arthur), when they weren't fast asleep in the sun, had four large toes!

We learned that giraffes have seven bones in their necks (and each has different patterns) and that there is only one species (but seven sub species)

We also saw this Stork which often sits on a lamp post on the by pass next to the zoo!

We had a really lovely day and once again I was reminded how home education has helped my son so much in his development ,it has given him space and time to develop his own coping strategies and I'm thankful for that. They can't be learned in 'social skills lessons' they have to be applied to real life and I have the time and motivation to give him that. We are truly blessed!

Lest we Forget

This week my daughter asked to go to the village remembrance service. It felt particularly important to go this year as we have been learning so much about the First world war and how it effected the lives of ordinary families in this the Centenary year.

I knew nothing about the First world war until a few years ago. The national curriculum didn't cover it! Even when I went on an exchange visit to Albert at the age of sixteen  a visit to Compiegne was wasted on me. What relevance was it to a sixteen year old girl who had no interest in wars?
Perhaps it's because I'm older now, although I don't think that's it. My interest began shortly after I began to home educate my son. Trips to the imperial war museums in Manchester and London,(which I imagined would be boring) fascinated me. They showed me that there was another side to war of killing and hate. There was the human side,the bit you got to see when you pulled away the veneer of 'glory and patriotism' and realised that ordinary people were the victim of political decisions which tore families  apart, and that in spite of the  fear and shortages  there were those beacons of light who shone with compassion and bravery,not because they did anything 'momentous' like cross the enemy lines ,but because they served in the voluntary services,offered shelter, visited wounded soldiers and wrote letters home for them and carried out random acts of kindness.We can all do that.

Of the books I've read recently  about the First world war there are some that stand out Teenage Tommy is the auto biography of a soldier who enlisted at fourteen, prior to the War . and spent the entire duration of the war caring for the horses.It's a lesson in history.I didn't know for example that villagers in Suffolk used to catch the sparrows nesting in hay stacks by banging pots and pans. The sparrows would rise from the haystack and be trapped in  nets and were then eaten on toast. Another thing I learned was that whilst the Cavalry spent their time in peacetime shining their metal buckles and buttons they were ordered to let them rust as soon as the war started so they wouldn't sparkle in the sun!




The Care and Management of Lies is a very different book. It's a fictional story about how letters filled with love and compassion lifted the spirits of the troops in the trenches. It also offered a warm hearted look at how rural life was affected when all the young and able men went off to war but there was a sad side to it too.

Private Peaceful is another book that made it's mark. I read it to my son a few years ago . I wasn't sure if it would be too much for him to handle. He understood the atrocity of war but his autism enabled him to deal with it factually rather than emotionally.  War Horse was another influence, as was the poetry of Wilfred Owen and the other war poets.It was only recently that I learned that Rudyard Kipling wrote some anti war poetry,his own son Jack was killed in the First World war and his story is told in My Boy Jack

I also went to a presentation of literature and poetry of  The First World War written by women and hosted by  our local library . I loved the story of the lady who travelled from Britain to the trenches just to check that her son was 'OK'. It just shows what ordinary human beings can do when they set their minds to it!

We've been watching The Passing Bells this week, a fictional story of two young men,one English,the other German who went to war. I think it was that which prompted my daughter to go to church today. I'm glad we did .Today I heard a new song " The keeper," the folk song about a young Game keeper who went to war and never returned.

We need to keep remembering that fighting and war are never a solution. We are stronger working together than apart.

Following interests makes for motivated children

It's been  six years  since I first started home educating my autistic son . It's been an interesting journey and has not always gone according to plan but I'm so glad I did it , both for him and for our family. As I read the comments of many parents on facebook who are glad the summer holidays are over I feel sad that they are unable to enjoy quality time with their children because of the pressures of work, trying to juggle child care and jobs and the difficulties that arise through having intense periods of family time when you have to cram so much into six short weeks.

Being at home with my son has allowed us to really get to know one another, to realize that we often need our own space, that we are different people and I have had to accept that for this child , at this moment,outside activities and crafts are not for him.

We have however discovered a common interest in history, me in the people, him in the events and the inventions and that's how we came to be at the Bovington Tank museum on Monday.

It all started a few months ago when he announced he would like to visit the biggest tank museum in the world- Bovington Tank museum. I'd never heard of it  so I did some research and discovered it was seven hours away in Dorset.

My son has just turned fourteen and getting him to set foot outside the house is a major operation so for him to ask to go anywhere is unusual. We took the bull by the horns and my husband booked a Premier inn in Dorchester,half an hour away from the museum and the visit was planned.

 I've noticed on several occasions now that when my son wants to do something
 1. He isn't stressed going out
2. He often doesn't wear his ear defenders
3.He eats just about any food given to him and
 4. He sleeps at night.

 For anyone who doesn't live with an autistic person they could argue that we just give in to him normally and that he's perfectly capable of going to bed at a sensible time and eating the same food as the rest of us,but as a friend put it yesterday "they don't know the wall that is autism"

My theory is that motivation overcomes all fear and anxiety enabling my son to do things he would normally find really hard.

What a success! We sat in a chieften tank and learned how they worked,

travelled in an APC,

watched a display of tanks and personnel carriers and learned the science behind tracks as opposed to wheels

 visited a reproduction world war 1 trench , a mock up of an army base in Afghanistan and walked through a hall showing the history of tanks starting with Little Willie and Mother to the present day! My son even completed a quiz sheet as he wanted a goody bag - for a boy who hates writing that's no mean feat. Six hours of pure unadulterated learning, no cohercian or pressure,just a desire to learn more! It has worked for my autistic son and convinced me that whilst school would not have worked for him, home education most certainly has! Interest led learning is the key!

Equality of the Sexes- through Autistic eyes!

It's been a few days since I posted,largely because I'm having a technical hitch posting photos and I LOVE taking photos.No blog should be without them!Anyway I decided to blog nevertheless and I'll worry about the problem later!
I haven't mentioned my Autistic son in a while.He doesn't (on the surface anyway) seem to do the same news worthy , inspirational activities of his siblings,largely because he still struggles to socialise or go out.Yesterday however, he told us that he had been studying the concept of feminism!
The subject he'd chosen was in itself  a revelation but ,when he started to talk about the subject, he revealed a deep thinking,intelligent young boy with a strong sense of justice!
 It appears he has been studying how inequality of the sexes came about! It started ,according to my son, because of physical differences.Stone age man were stronger than their wives, so off they went to work ,hunting and gathering whilst their wives stayed at home to look after the children.
My son kept referring to the men working 'harder' than the women and at first I thought I had a chauvinist in the making. I was wrong. Being autistic he was using the word "hard work"  to mean 'heavy physical work' .Often autistic people can be misunderstood in this way,because although they can be very articulate and have a vast vocabulary they can sometimes misuse words which to us have a different meaning. That's why you really have to get to know an autistic person really well to understand them. I often say to my son that we use the same words but speak a different language.
 He explained that there are some jobs where he would prefer to appoint a man e.g. a fireman who was stronger and able to carry him down a ladder out of a fire and other jobs where a woman would usually be better e.g. a secretary because of their ability to multi- task.It was clear as I deliberately threw opposing points of view at him,that he was of the opinion that they were both equal in their differences! I did wonder if he had read the book Why Men don't listen and Women can't read Maps.!
In his research he had covered The Suffragettes, the role of Women during World War 2 and their entrance into the workplace after the war and the strikes at The Dagenham Car plant for equal pay for women. What sparked his interest and how he came to think about the subject I have no idea! But take heart.I promise you that whilst your child may not appear to you to be doing anything remotely educational at all.They most certainly are!

Scrap yards and Charity Shops

Well he did it! My eldest has passed his driving test FIRST TIME! It was interesting the way the 'non home educating' people reacted when he told them that he had his test and would be coming to work in his car the next day. "That's if you pass" they said " Oh I will" he replied. He had faith you see, in his abilities. He wasn't boasting or showing off- he was just confident because no one had ever put the doubt in his mind that he couldn't or wouldn't do it. Although it's not strictly home education it really is- because it's just a continuation of the life long learning we've encouraged since we started home educating his younger brother.

He got his theory test under his belt as soon as he turned seventeen. He started his apprenticeship a month later than his peer group who returned to college in September and he decided to spend the time revising for his theory. My son, who hated the 'falseness' of school and exams, had a reason to teach himself the highway code because he wanted to drive.

So the test is passed, the car is on the drive (he's had that since he was fourteen) and it now has new alloys and fog lights and little tiny dust caps that look like green die with dots on each face of the cube.

He paid for his driving lessons himself (his suggestion) as he felt there would be more motivation to pass . He has also been saving for the insurance with the money he's earned since he started his apprenticeship. A lesson is comparison websites and doing his research, brought the price down to £500 less than he thought he would need to pay. Next came the lesson in using a cash back sites which reduced it by a further £40. Not bad for a maths lesson!

He then took the very mature decision to be patient and wait to the end of the month (another seven days) so that he could buy his car tax at the beginning of the month and make the most of his money. He doesn't know it yet but we'll pay for his car tax- we are so very proud of him.

So this time next week he will start learning to drive for real and I suspect that our passion for charity shop finds will be widening to scrap yard bargains in the future.

Gardening in our home education

Well we had an early start this morning as we are off to paint tyres to make garden planters in the Mill lane garden.It has been an exciting time building this garden.A time of highs and lows,of extreme stress,worrying about whether it will be ready for judging, and even more importantly not wanting to let the day care users and their parents down , but also a vibrant example of people coming together,combining talents and working towards a goal.We've had paint and tyres donated and all we've given is our time.

From a personal perspective it has renewed my desire to create a beautiful wild garden space out of our one and a half acre plot at home and I have already been clearing brambles this week, they grow so rapidly when spring arrives.

I have obtained free wild flower seeds, seed potatoes and even rescued a washed up tyre from the high tide at the weekend and my daughter rolled it back through the village.

 I've also joined a lovely facebook community called The Friendly Gardeners who have so many ideas and are full of encouragement..The project has shown me that it is possible to garden on a shoe sting budget even to the point of making a green house or cold frame out of plastic bottles if you put your mind to it.After all that's what true cottage gardening is all about.

We have always used our wild space for home education.We have found dunnocks and blackbirds nests,stumbled across a pheasant's nest, rescued wood pigeons and magpies.Watched slugs and a mole as it buried itself into the soil and there has been many a time when the children had to shepherd springy lambs back into the field behind us.

The twins are thirteen now and my son is less inclined to go into the garden,particularly to 'learn' anything but I realise that in fact he understands the food chain because he sees it in his daily life, he has lived with chickens for the last four years and was there when we collected them,built the coop and their enclosure and he knows exactly how to encourage them with pellets to come home if they decide to go on a recce round the village.There's nothing funnier than watching a hen scurrying back to its coop alongside a little boy who is going to feed it.

He has stood in the field watching lambs being born,called the farmer when a sheep had a difficult birth and witnessed the sadness of a still born lamb , (all part of the circle of life) but it is something than many children never have the opportunity to experience and he and his siblings are exceptionally lucky to live where they do. The daffodils in the garden are just coming into bud and the lambs in the village are due next week so I guess that spring is here.

Taking ownership of our education

I've been out for a walk today. I needed the break. It feels like I have been battling the system for a week now. My son went to college on Tuesday as he had an exam. When he got there his training provider had failed to enter him despite the college reminding them.

It wasn't until that point that I realised that we were losing control of his education, three layers of bureaucracy from his immediate employers , our local council who in turn contract out training to a company who don't do motor vehicle maintenance and who have therefore subcontracted my son's training still further.

The delays and mistakes made through lack of communication have in fact put my son's training back by about 4 months. It's a learning curve and it's not all doom and gloom, my son is on the point of being able to drive, has thrived in the working environment and has seen how the local authority works because he's been at the sharp end and it's shown him how budget cuts, lack of staffing ,disagreements about which departments pay for what leads to an inefficient oiling of the system. For me with a background in the private sector it has been an eye opener. What should be an establishment of opportunity and self advancement (which in fact it sets itself up to be)  in fact has a culture of disillusionment and mistrust which is getting in the way of those who want to succeed.

Any way we are on the case now and our aim is to get my son's education back on track. He had no intention of finishing his education at 18  but it's one of those situations where someone has dumped an unwelcome and unnecessary mountain in the way and we are going to have to circumnavigate it.

Fortunately home education has given us the necessary qualifications we need and we are beginning to lop off the diseased branches impeding my son's path to personal success. Buffalo coming through.......Watch this space!

Rocky Road in the Highways Department!

What a lovely surprise! My daughter has just received an invitation to watch a performance of "Accrington Pals."She has 2 complimentary tickets and it's on my birthday.How good is that!All about World war one as well - a fantastic opportunity for her to learn in a way that suits her.She wants to do performing arts and although three years away we are exploring that now so she has a chance to see if she likes it. We will be grabbing the opportunity to have a girls night!

It's been quite a week. My eldest son was chosen to take part in The Brathay Trust Apprenticeship challenge and the team are working on a garden for adults with learning difficulties and mental health issues. It has been interesting to watch as they have grappled with concepts of publicity, time management, project management,sponsorship and communication. A huge learning curve for a bunch of youngsters who in addition to working full time are spending their free time voluntarily planning a garden.

They have set up their Facebook page  Cumbria's Finest and posted pictures on it of them at work in the garden.

My daughter is helping to raise funds by making cakes. We had Rocky Roads in the Highways department the other day.Today is Flapjack and I've bought us a cup cake book so we can practice our icing skills! All this is practice for her Catering GCSE next year. I reckon that if she can cook she will always have the ability to make a living whether in cake decoration or in a restaurant.At the moment it isn't her intended choice of career but it's a life skill that won't go wasted and she enjoys it so I want to encourage her especially as she is on a high after winning the school Masterchef competition.

Twin brother meanwhile continues to concentrate on his Japanese. He was telling me the other day that the ancient Japanese built their pagodas with a framework of poles which were to guard against  earthquakes and that exactly the same technology is used in Japanese buildings today. He also mentioned Kyoto and I mentioned the climate change summit that took place there and said I would try and find out more about it for him. He spent last evening watching a television debate about the benefit changes being imposed by the British government, it is interesting to see the strong political debates he is able to raise because he has been free of the constraints of the mainstream education system for so long and has the confidence to air his opinions and to realise that they are as valid as the other man,even at the age of thirteen. In fact Friday nights at his grandparents house are becoming a bit like a session of Mastermind as he discusses his view on the world and answers some of their crossword clues that we are unable to answer. The second largest country in the world is he said, Canada,not Russia or China as we supposed.

I meanwhile have to finish my book and sharpish. "The Book Thief " comes out at the pictures next week and we are going to see it , so the heat is on. I'm also collecting plants for The Brathay Challenge garden today from a local community garden and the opportunity has arisen for me to do NVQ level 1 in Horticulture. It might just come in useful in our garden. I'm doing a free Future learn online course of the new computer programming curriculum for September 2014. It seems that whilst I have a long way to go,I am not as computer illiterate as I thought I was and am at least on a par with many of the primary school teachers. I suspect from what I'm reading however that my son is well ahead of the game,even without a teacher.Sadly that's the education system for you,it has a lot of catching up to do.

All Booked up!

I'm reading The Guernsey Literary Potato Peel Pie society. I'd recommend it. Just  the title intriuged me and ,when I read the reviews I couldn't resist having a peek. The story covers the occupation of Guernsey by the germans during the second world war and follows the lives of some very different characters who 'were accidently  brought together  to share their love of reading in the local Literacy society.

That got me thinking about the role of books in our own home education journey. As a child I devoured books but as I progressed further through the school system the books I read became more and more dictated by the subjects I was studying so that by the time I was studying for my Law degree the only books I read were Law books .Reading for fun had just disappeared.

It was only years later, when I started down the road of home education that I began to read again.Initially to learn what I needed to 'teach' (I know better now ) and then for fun.

The other day I came across this article in Brain Pickings which featured letters to children about the joy of reading. No one can make a child 'enjoy reading' but if you allow children to read what interests them then the majority of children will want more. School puts children off books. I know that for me I never ever want to see or read Waiting for Godot ever again, whilst for my son it's John Steinbeck's Mice and Men.

One website which offers reviews of great childrens' books is Love Reading 4 Kids. It's there that I uncovered a fabulous list of children's books about the First World War. I devour The Book People catalogue when it drops through the letterbox and it's a great excuse to grab a cup of coffee and choose books with my son. He has just chosen a Minecraft book on Redstone and an Usborne book about world war 1.

Books provide an education by stealth. Take The Guernsey Literary Potato Peel Pie society as an example  I didn't intend to learn about the german occupation of Guernsey.It just happened. It reminded me to of a Michael Morpurgo book called Why the Whales came ,a children's story  of the Scilly isles during world war 1 and The Mozart Question when musicians were forced to play in concentration camps as Jews went to their deaths.

Books are sparks which ignite an interest in a subject we then follow through. If you are stuck for ideas it might just be worth opening one to see what ideas pop out!

A Family Affair

Yesterday evening my husband went out to the garage to saw a coconut in half whilst my daughter sat at the kitchen table whittling sticks from the garden into skewers.As I watched them I marvelled at how our home life has changed for the better since we began home educating my autistic son.

We are all now involved together in education and it's good fun. This particular evening we were helping my daughter prepare for her school Master Chef competition. Her challenge was to choose a celebrity and cook a meal for them.My daughter had opted for her favourite heroine Katness from "The Hunger Games" and we had much debate about the type of foods she might eat. As a hunter we decided she would be used to foraging for food and cooking on camp fires (hence the skewers). The coconuts were to be scooped out as bowls for rice and the skewers would be spiked with chicken, peppers, onions and mushrooms. Desert was to be a chocolate bombe. A sudden surprise oozing chocolate when you cut into it, a bit like one of Katness' weapons to kill her enemy.

It was lovely to see the huge smile on my daughter's face today when she came home to say that the judges had awarded her one point less than the total amount of available marks, for taste, presentation and creativity (the kebabs were served on a slate dish to represent stone and the chocolate bombes in small red dishes on a square black plate and dusted with icing sugar and a small orange fruit from Columbia called a Physalis). It made me realise how differently we think about education since my eldest started school twelve years ago. This wasn't about winning, or competition. It was about having fun and that's just what we did.

We sampled the inside of a coconut, tasted a new fruit,scooped the coconut out for the birds, and looked at pictures of foods for foraging , and ways to present it. 

Homework is no longer the burden it was me when I was working in a pressurised job and rushing into the house to be confronted by a fractious child , needing help whilst I was trying to make tea as we had to dash out  for choir or scouts. Neither do I blame the teachers for subjecting my children to irrelevant and uninteresting subjects. They are doing their best with the curriculum they've been given.

What we are trying to do though is to show our children that learning is what they make of it.The can be constricted by the restrictions of the curriculum or can learn from life experience and see how the subjects they are learning at school fit in with those experiences.

The State of our Education!

Schools are fining families who take their children on holiday in term time,there is even talk of fining families whose child is persistently late.You have to ask yourself whether the people who make these rules remotely understand what it is like to have a child with Aspergers. who refuses to go to school each morning.

 I've also heard stories of children having biscuits and cakes taken out their lunch boxes because that food is 'banned', even heard that the government were discussing banning packed lunches all together. What on earth do you do if your child will only eat one type of food in a stressful environment like school. What a mess our education system is in.It's becoming more like a communist state than a democratic society.

Decent hard working families ,who a few years ago would probably not have challenged the system .are starting to see their freedoms being eroded and the rumblings and undercurrent show that many aren't happy. I realised today how bad it had got when my husband suggested my daughter might be better off in an independent school. as at least there would be a degree of flexibility.

If my daughter were unhappy at school then  I suppose it would be an option but not one for which I'd have a great deal of enthusiasm, .Having home educated my son for five years I'm sorry to say I no longer think that school is the best place to learn.

My daughter goes to school because she enjoys meeting her friends there,not because I think it is the best place to learn.She does that at home.She thrives on having people around her and she has lots of friends.Dance also  plays a large part at  school and that's her favourite subject.

I'm not arguing that she wouldn't socialise at home.Far from it,she would never be at home,what with dance and drama classes,scouts and the gym.She is just not unhappy.She has her goals,knows what she needs to achieve them and the simplest route will be to navigate the system rather than swim against the flow.

Only time will tell whether we have made the right decision for each of our children.What I do know is that they are all different and we have respected that and listened to them.I think that they are responsible for their own choices.We can give them options but we need to accept their  choices,even if we have our doubts that they are the right ones.They learn by their mistakes just as much as their successes.At least we have the satisfaction of knowing that it's not too late to take another subject if they need it later on.We just need to follow their lead!

Transition at Sixteen - what's best if you're Autistic?

Autism hasn't featured very heavily in my blog recently because at the moment it isn't a major issue. It hasn't gone away, but as with many people with Aspergers it depends on my son's anxiety levels as to how his behaviour affects his moods and our family life and at the moment we are on a roll!

This week my husband has been speaking to a web designer about his new business. During his time at the website company he has met several employees, many of whom he has recognised are on the 'spectrum'. Whether they have a diagnosis or not is unknown,but when you live with someone with Autism it isn't hard to spot!

My husband explained my son's current interest in computer programming and now has an offer of help if my son runs into difficulties. Whilst his twin sister is choosing her GCSE options at the moment,we are looking for opportunities for our son to choose the life skills that will be important to him to live independently. He may struggle with interviews because of anxiety but if he can learn a skill now without 'pressure to perform', who knows he might be offered an opportunity to work or set up his own business? It's so unlike school when there is that panic moment at 16 about "what next" with so little thought about the huge transition involved for our children.

Whilst we slowly progress forward as my son develops.his twin sister has chosen the subjects she loves for her options. She opened the Options booklet only to be welcomed by a paragraph about the government's "suggested subjects"- thankfully the school are not enforcing them as they are purely guidelines but what choice is it when the government are dictating the subjects they recommend everyone should learn. What a sad society we would live in if everyone was the same! My eldest son,only two years ago, chose to go to college one day a week instead of two of his GCSE'S.He was student of the year and he earned an apprenticeship. This option is no longer available to my daughter- the choices are getting narrower.

Anyway,as I've said,she has chosen her favourite subjects, dance, P.E, catering and history or geography.We've learned from home education that if you like something you are likely to be more motivated and get a better result.It seems a reasonable assumption so we'll stick to our guns!

History through film!

As soon as we got back from the cinema yesterday my son got out his ipad and began to google Burma and the Death Railway. We had been to see The Railway Man Man and I have to say it is one of those films that left an indelible imprint in my mind. The last film I went to like that was The Boy in the Striped Pyjamas. When the film ended the audience didn't just get up as they normally would, but sat in stunned silence for a while coming to terms with what they had seen and trying to understand how, in the middle of war, human beings can be so 'inhumane' .But the film also showed how humans have the ability to overcome hatred and fear through forgiveness,

It certainly isn't a film for young children. It is certified 15 but I would still consider that for some it would be too traumatic.One of the traits of Aspergers however (at least in the case of my son) is the ability to separate his emotions from fact.Some would call it a lack of empathy but it is rather an ability to distance himself from the personalities involved and to look at the facts objectively rather than the inability to understand the sadness and hurt caused to people in times of war.

As I watched my son researching the role of the Japanese in the second world war I realised that that was the difference between a home educated child and a main stream 'spoon fed' child. That afternoon in the cinema had been a history lesson on the treatment of the British by the Japanese in Burma during the second world war and my son wanted to discover the facts, the film (which may not be fully historically accurate) had just wetted his appetite!

What my son did pick up (and I didn't) was that the railway was built next to the River Kwai and my job this morning has been to order The Bridge on the River Kwai at my son's request.

What else did we get from the film- well a glimpse I suppose that Eric Lomax  * the British prisoner of war upon which the film is based may have had Aspergers- he certainly had an obsession with Railway lines- how else would he have been able to memorise train timetables, carry around Bradshaw's directory and been able to identify where the cattle trucks had taken them when they were transported to Burma.

It also showed the terrible mental after effects of war.We would no doubt call it post traumatic stress disorder today. The in-hospital conditions in Burma - the reason why the British Empire failed to complete the railways line.

In the credits at the end of the film it said that the Japanese officer Nagase had died in 2010 and Eric Lomax had died in 2012, shortly before the film was complete.I then remembered watching a documentary "Enemy my Friend" about them both being reconciled.

So much learned (and no doubt remembered) from a two hour lesson at the cinema and yet we have only just scratched the surface!

* Some of the description of the brutality suffered by Lomax in this link to The Telegraph article are distressing .

Copper, Charcoal and Hydro electric

I had one of those spontaneous moments the other day. An opportunity to grab ' me time' and go for a walk.As the day was bright and clear I decided to grasp the  opportunity and go up to Coniston as I was due to pick up my daughter after school in any case.

I’d been meaning to take photos of  the boats on Coniston Water at Water Yeat for months, the water is often so still as you go past. Having time to stop,I  parked the car and walked down to the Lake shore. I soon realised I need new walking shoes,it didn't take long before I had wet socks!

I caught a couple of pictures of the sheep, which are various colours at the moment- when I was young I can’t remember coloured sheep but now we have all hues on the hill sides at this time of year, blue, pink, red and yellow.

The water was still but not as glass like as I’ve seen.Despite it being a grey day and not the best for photos I  took some – it’s still beautiful. There was a scattering of snow on Coniston old Man in the distance- the first I’d seen this year.

Then off I set to Coniston and parked at the bottom of the Coppermines Valley. It’s called that because they used to mine copper up on the mountain and the evidence of the industrial past is still there. That’s what I love about the Lake District,apparently the woods around the Lake were at one time filled with Charcoal burners earning a living- they are mentioned by Arthur Ransome in Swallows and Amazons and the valley, which is now deserted, apart from a Youth Hostel and a few holiday cottages and walkers making their way towards Levers Water and the old Man, would have been a hive of industry. Tourism has replaced industry today.

Mound of mined copper

Mine workings

I passed a steep waterfall with a small dam which bore a sign stating it was Coniston hydro electric dam dam. Not on the scale of Pitlochy but a small local supply of electricity and yet another a lesson in home education how green power can be harnessed from local resources. We are surrounded in the area by windmills too, particularly the Walney windfarm which we can see offshore from our garden- it has changed the landscape considerably. As I walked along the track towards Levers water I was passed by two or three water utility vans making their way up the the central hub of the dam and I wondered whether they were as successful when the track is covered in snow and ice,

I reached the buildings in which the water service industry was based and sat on a rock looking down the valley towards the lake with my flask of coffee thinking that this must be one of the best coffee shops in the world. Then it was time for me to turn back and walk down to my responsibilities in the real world.